Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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