; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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