dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
