Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.