who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
