i'm signing you up for texting rehab
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
