i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
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