alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I am midnight drunk by noon
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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