is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize