please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
