all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
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