Pappa wants mamma naked
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize