Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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