she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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