Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
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