im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
it hurts more in the daytime
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
