we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
