She's JV to your varsity
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Randomize
