making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
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