Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
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could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
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My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
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