the new term for farting is butt boxing.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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