Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize