I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
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