i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize