Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Randomize
