Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
If I die, sorry about rent.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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