She went from zero to smokin in five shots
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
