Little spoons don't ask big questions
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
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