I didn't shave. On purpose
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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