so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
