Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.