me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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