Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
