I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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