i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize