HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
