dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 608 share tweet
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
