how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
