he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
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