Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.

  (248): View more from Michigan

  You're ridiculous

  (586): View more from Michigan

  Your hot

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  (586): You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here. (248): You're ridiculous (586): Your hot http://tfl.nu/tqwg
  Replies (3) Good night (1463) Bad night (586)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity

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  (619): I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity http://tfl.nu/ljia
  Replies (5) Good night (1281) Bad night (580)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina

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  (516): what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina http://tfl.nu/zqnz
  Replies (92) Good night (1232) Bad night (5542)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.

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  (608): and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet. http://tfl.nu/bxi6
  Replies (22) Good night (713) Bad night (2111)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.

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  (314): I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures. http://tfl.nu/uab2
  Replies (124) Good night (4950) Bad night (1026)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.

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  (812): Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was. http://tfl.nu/nuhx
  Replies (28) Good night (8743) Bad night (835)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.

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  (440): I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise. http://tfl.nu/okxz
  Replies (13) Good night (5522) Bad night (1253)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.

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  (732): Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home. http://tfl.nu/palx
  Replies (2) Good night (2970) Bad night (846)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?

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  (717): So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards? http://tfl.nu/22rv
  Replies (5) Good night (1117) Bad night (518)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth

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  (716): Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth http://tfl.nu/he9m
  Replies (1) Good night (614) Bad night (513)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better

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  (816): sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better http://tfl.nu/09bw
  Replies (4) Good night (379) Bad night (892)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.

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  (914): He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him. http://tfl.nu/d8kc
  Replies (4) Good night (1661) Bad night (397)
• Favorite

  (731): View more from Tennessee

  Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too

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  (731): Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too http://tfl.nu/4c0u
  Replies (8) Good night (1321) Bad night (570)
• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"

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  (469): The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party" http://tfl.nu/vn3r
  Replies (0) Good night (843) Bad night (272)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?

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  (323): I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today? http://tfl.nu/ws7y
  Replies (2) Good night (596) Bad night (278)

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