I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
