he thought i was a dude.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I will be naked everywhere
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize