i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize