I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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