and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
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she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
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only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning