whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
