peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
