Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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