It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
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my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
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These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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