I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
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found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
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I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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