I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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