This girl is more easily done than said...
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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