have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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