he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
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He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
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And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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